On the night of 17th of June 2015

I got scolded for being a little messy and not doing so well at work but no worries, I stayed positive, my work is done and I came home happy. Logged on to my wonderful baby PC and waited for it to load everything. As I waited patiently, my tummy was churning with excitement and I couldn't stand to play my game again. I love the feeling of coming home to the world I love. 

Somehow, today I felt.. useless... I am playing with a friend of mine (initially) which he invited a few of his guy friends to play. Guys being a more common gender to play games compared to girls. I didnt mind it, the more the merrier, yada yada yada. But after a while, being the only girl there, and a working one too while the others are not working, having their semester break, I got left behind. I was by far, not well aware of anything happening, not knowing what to do so I just stood on a cliff (the homebase is on a beautiful cliff which overlooks the lake below) and stared. Because I really have no idea what to do. They are off talking about hunting for materials (we chatted on Mumble) and hunting for food and well, I am the only one with no transportation (a trike killed my raptor because I am an ass for bringing out hunting). 

I don't want to sound sensitive and all but no matter what I do, I am sensitive, I tend to over think stuff. Some of them said I can always join them, I can always do anything I like but what I did may not be something that they like so I avoid doing anything unless told (just my character). And I don't want to be treated as a girl, being treated like I needed help every single time which thankfully they did not. I am a big girl, I can take care of my own. 

I know all this sounds far-fetched like OMG it's just a game. but behind that other computer is a human being. They still can feel emotions and annoyance is the last thing I want them to think about.

So, tomorrow onwards, I will have to rely on my own, they had build one beautiful case with fences, i will have to run around and try to hunt back for the same colour raptor that died (it was black with gray spots with a bluish purple spine, I didn't get to take a picture with it). Anyway, it is time for me to sleep. I have work tomorrow. It's a THURSDAY tomorrow, which means 1 more day to the weekend since Friday night to me is considered the weekends. 

And as always, thank you for reading. Goodnight.